Saturday, February 22, 2014

#89: Blazeon: The Bio-Cyborg Challenge

BLAZE ON!
blaZeon is a game I'd never heard of, but from the name it sounded like it was probably a racing game of some kind. Turns out it's a side scrolling shooter ported to the SNES from the arcade. That hasn't gone very well thus far in this adventure...

PEW PEW!
This game has a twist on the standard kill things to get power ups to become viable and then die once and get screwed thing. There are no standard power ups at all. Instead every now and then a gigantic mech will come out and attack you. You have a stun pod you can launch at it which turns it blue. Then if you fly into it you become the giant mech! Interestingly if you do any damage to the mech before you stun it your captured mech keeps that damage so you need to just stun it, never hurt it.
What? I don't even...
I got to the boss of the first level, lost my mech, and then had to try to win the fight with my remaining 2 lives and basic ship. I failed. I tried again. I failed.

The problem is this game was originally an arcade game. It wasn't built to be fair, or beatable. It was built to convince you to pump quarters into it. I'm generally pretty good at 'bullet hell' but this boss was something else. I really think he was just designed to kill you over and over. Want to get back to being awesome in a mech? Pay more money.

Man... Were original arcade games pay to win?

Rating: D

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